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Ways to Help Students with Anxiety

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Let’s be honest – everyone is talking about anxiety.  You cannot turn on the TV or listen to any talk show without hearing about how someone is suffering from anxiety.  When I sit back and think about it, I think there are a few major reasons behind this phenomenon.

  1. People were never meant to be THIS connected.  Do y’all remember the days when you went home from work/school and you didn’t hear from or talk to those people you saw throughout the day again UNTIL THE NEXT DAY? GASP! I miss actually having to remember to tell my mom that really crazy thing that happened in class when I’m at the dinner table instead of texting her AS SOON AS IT HAPPENS.  We’re overwhelmed with connections. I’ve gone exactly eleven minutes without reloading my email, I’m wondering what my favorite fashion blogger is putting on her Instagram stories today, and I’m texting my BFF who lives across the country all while typing this blog post. Isn’t that a little much?
  2. We have too many options and too much stimulation.  When’s the last time you watched a TV show without scrolling through Pinterest? Does it not make your skin crawl to have to sit through a movie at the theater and only.sit.there? We can Google any information at the second’s notice, we can receive any level of education on the internet, we can play games on our phones while at our children’s dance recitals…but we cannot be still.  We are a society that is uncomfortable in the silence and restless in relaxation. We preach “self-care” yet glorify “busy”. It is overwhelming.
  3. People over-diagnose themselves when they feel uncomfortable. Anxiety is NOT feeling worried or uncomfortable. In fact, it’s one of those things that is often self-diagnosed. Don’t get me wrong, I FULLY BELIEVE ANXIETY IS VERY, VERY REAL. I’ve been a worrier my whole life – that’s NOT anxiety.  Anxiety is debilitating, crippling, and all-consuming. It wasn’t until I had the Epstein-Barr virus (Mono) as a 25-year-old adult that I knew what anxiety meant. It’s like the virus “woke up” something horrible in my brain (there’s actually some interesting articles out there connecting Mono with anxiety.) that I could NOT shut off.  I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t hold a regular conversation, I couldn’t see a way out. When you suffer from real, live anxiety – YOU KNOW IT. You will do anything for relief. 

With all of this being said, rest assured that the classroom is plagued with anxious children.  You seriously WOULD.NOT.BELIEVE. Some of the things that children in your own neighborhood or backyard are struggling with.  Our students are coming to school every single day thinking ALL the thoughts, asking ALL the questions: Where am I going to sleep tonight? Where will my next meal come from? Will my mother hit me today? Will my father ever be released from prison? Will my sister be picked up by the police tonight? How much __________ can I sell to pay our power bill this month? Will my ACT score get me into any college? How am I going to work 40 hours this week and do my homework? Will she post my outfit on Snapchat and make fun of me today? Will he spread that rumor about what didn’t happen last weekend? Then, there’s alwayssss time to go down the rabbit hole of what if’s and made up stories our brains start believe…IT TRULY NEVER STOPS. 
Through my own struggle with anxiety and “dark thoughts”, I’ve really focused on how I can help students who struggle with the same things.  It’s definitely not easy. There is not a quick, overnight fix. However, I’ve started a few habits within my own class that have helped to alleviate some of the anxious struggles by stopping triggers before they start. 


1. Zone in on Structure

Make a seating chart: Hear me out on this, I know that I’m in the minority but I FIRMLY believe in making and consistently sticking with a seating chart in secondary classrooms.  Yes, I’ve read all the research and ALL of the BEAUTIFUL blog posts on the power of student choice and flexible seating.  
I just simply don’t think it works.  In a perfect world, it would.  This world/classroom is anything but perfect.  When students come in knowing where they will sit each day, it eliminates worry.  Students won’t have to think about who will/will not want to sit with them, who will take their seats, if anyone will want to be in their group for a project, etc. Seating charts really do work, and believe it or not, most students crave routine and structure.
I definitely do not advocate for leaving students in the same spot all semester or sitting them beside someone who makes them uncomfortable.  It takes a reflective teacher to make seating charts work because they should be evolving and changing often.  Pay attention to your students’ needs: Does someone need to move closer to you to remain focused? Does someone need a peer helper to keep them on task? Is there anyone who is above grade level that can be seated with like-minded peers to increase productivity? For more information on how to craft a really freakin’ amazing seating chart, check out Maneuvering the Middle’s Post – I only wish I could’ve crafted something this great. 🙂 Her post is about middle school, but it would also work well in a high school setting. 

Remain consistent – no matter what: We all know that classroom disruptions and distractions can be anxiety-producing.  No matter the time or place, someone is going to try to buck the system and someone is going to be really dang mean.  Those are just facts of life.  
Establish boundaries and expectations on the very first day and CONSISTENTLY follow those expectations.  On day one, I tell my students what irritates me to no end: cell phones and sass.  I tell them straight up that I am not going to do anything to purposefully make them mad or uncomfortable, so they should not do that to me or anyone else.  When someone, no matter who they are or who their momma is, breaks these expectations there ARE consequences.  It hurts so much when a sweet angel child has a little slip-up and you have to discipline them just like the “friend” who is always sassing and throwing fits.  However, when you remain consistent, it takes the guesswork out of the equation. Students do not have to worry about what will happen and how badly they’ll be embarrassed by a classmate.  I actually wrote a blog post on how to tame many of these issues in a previous blog post that you can find here

2. Music is your friend – use it!
Crank up that Spotify: For years and years and years I avoided music in the classroom at all costs.  It actually kind of irritated me.  I HATE when students have in their earbuds, so I just automatically connected music with irritation in my head.  All of these negative Nancy thoughts about music changed for me last year.  I had a class of 30 children that simply did.not.talk. It was so eerie. I always felt as if they were picking me apart with their eyes and silent judgment.  The saying about silence being deafening is TRUE. I COULD HEAR THE CLOCK TICKING. 
In the middle of researching where this new breed of children came from, I had an epiphany- maybe they don’t hate me and the entire world…maybe they’re just afraid to speak. They literally would not ask any questions or answer any questions in class. They were so anxious about being judged that they simply would not talk. 

Therefore, I tapped into my inner Maniacs in the Middle and created a Spotify playlist. Josie is basically a teacher-classroom DJ extraordinaire and actually wrote a whole blog post (and does some pretty stellar professional development) where she advocates for the use of music in the classroom.  

As soon as I started playing music in my silent classroom, I noticed a HUGE transformation.  While the music was playing, students would call me over and ask me questions.  If a song ever changed, they would actually stop speaking until the song came back on.  I experimented again by playing music during their group work – YA’LL, THEY ACTUALLY TALKED TO EACH OTHER. It’s like the background noise took the pressure off and made them feel more at ease. We even bonded over common favorite songs! By “filling the gaps” with soothing or fun music, my students’ whole attitude changed. It was just the right amount of distraction to erase some anxiety and help promote the confidence to speak up!
You can check out my own personal Classroom Spotify Playlist Here. Keep in mind, you need to know your own demographic and always preview songs before you use them in your classroom. I teach 16-year-olds all day from very diverse backgrounds.  Also, remember that I love Jesus and I feel like a little not-so-obvious worship song never hurt anyone. 

3. Know it’s coming and build in breaks. 
Transitions: I know that every school district varies as far as class time goes.  Personally, I have 4, 90 minute class periods a day. It’s TOUGH to keep a squad of 16-year-olds busy and in place for an hour and a half.  My college classes weren’t even that long! 
I’ve found that many students start getting anxious, overwhelmed, or let their minds wander when they sit too long OR focus on one task for too long.  I like to plan AT LEAST 3 activities for each class period so their brains don’t become stagnant and start to race other places.  When their minds are engaged and occupied, anxiety can be interrupted – which is a good thing. I’m not looking through rose-colored glasses enough to think that staying busy will scare away all anxiety all of the time. However, I do try to think about how I can keep their anxiety under wraps by pushing them to jump into multiple activities in each class period.  
These multiple activities increase transition time which is such a great time for students to decompress.  Taking 2 minutes to take out a notebook, cut a sheet of paper, and glue it in a certain section really does do wonders for the brain!  Choosing multiple activities per class period doesn’t have to be crazy difficult or creative, it just takes a little planning to consider timing. I may start the class with a literary element matching game, then transition to a mini-lesson with a foldable on analyzing symbols, and finally, wrap up with gluing in the foldable and practicing the new concept with a fresh read in a small group setting.  
The precious minutes in between activities give the students a break, but also keeps them on their toes when it comes to engagement and learning. 

Ask a student to do a task: There WILL be a time when a student has noticeably had “too much” and may be edging dangerously close to an anxiety attack. When you know your students, you know their triggers.  However, there will also be days where it’s just simply a bad, nervous, day.  We have to be okay with this and really try to avoid frustration with the student. I promise you that the student does not want to feel this way.  
When I notice one of my babes acting abnormally distant or displaying anxious behaviors (irritability, trembling, rapid breathing, holding head or head down, meltdowns, restlessness,  etc.), I go to one of my tried and true methods:
– Tell them to go get water, take a lap (reasonably and safely) down the hall and back, tell them to go in the hall and text mom/dad/someone who makes them feel comfortable, etc. 
– Create a fake errand and have them perform the task. “Can you take this folder to Ms. _____________ for me?” “Would you please go to the library and check out ______________ book for me?” “Can you go make 10 copies of this paper for me?”  Sometimes taking a mental break from the classroom and adding a little time for movement and breathing can make all of the difference!
– Simply ask them: What can I do to make you feel better today? Is everything alright? Would you like to talk about it? Would a snack make you feel better? 


Buddy system: I am constantly amazed by the kindness and compassion that students show to each other on a daily basis.  Many times, a student will recognize another student’s struggle with anxiety and sense a need for help.  Play into this! If a student is feeling anxious and asks to go get water/take a break/etc., consider asking the kind student: Will you go check on __________ and make sure she’s okay? This may sound creepy, but most of the time it really works well.  I’ve also sent my anxious student and the helper student on an errand together.  This gives them an opportunity to talk and decompress without being in front of an entire classroom.  The sweetest thing is when I have students come in and privately tell me that another student “isn’t having a good day.”  This signals to me that their friend may need a little extra love and help on that day. 
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It’s important to keep in mind that these interventions are only suggestions. They’ve worked in my own personal classroom, but they may not work in yours. Your school counselors are GREAT resources for getting ideas and strategies on how to help students who struggle with anxiety.  I always appreciate a strategy that doesn’t take away from learning or reduce rigor. I’m a huge advocate for finding a way to make anxiety work in your favor.  Always let students know that they are not alone or an outcast in their suffering. Remember that anxiety can surface in so many ways and for so many reasons.  Check out this fantastic article which offers way more details and insight: Classroom Anxiety in Children. Also, Edutopia and WeAreTeachers.com are bosses and both have articles on student anxiety that are SUPER interesting. You can find those HERE and HERE

Now I’m interested: How do you help students in your own classroom who struggle with anxiety? How can I help these students to feel even safer and more comfortable at school? I had a student tell me once that, “anxiety is just the stories we tell ourselves.” Let’s work together to eliminate the overwhelming worry that our students struggle within the tales of their own lives and encourage those children to tell stories of power, confidence, and hope. 

Dr. Lily Gates